that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize
