i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
