How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Randomize
