Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
