Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
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