Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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