as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
