just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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