we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
worst night to have a conscience
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
