Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Randomize