her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
