I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
