After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
