areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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