I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
