i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
