these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
