I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
