69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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