We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
