He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
