i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
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