i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
