But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
