last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
