In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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