I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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