they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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