You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
