And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
