i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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