white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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