What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
