It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Drunk is a universal language darling
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