He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize