I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
