you guys were way drunker than both of me
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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