David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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