You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
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