Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
