I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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