when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Randomize