this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
