Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
