yo everyone went to the hospital last night
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
