Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
