God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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