One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
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