Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
