Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Randomize
